Monday, 15 August 2016

From my heart

I am going through such a painful hurtful time.
I seem to only come to on this blog when matters of the heart arise.
I was hoping with this relationship I was not going to go through any more heartbreaks
Obviously, I thought very wrong.

Nonetheless, I believe as always what doesn't kill you will only make you stronger
It's been a little over two weeks, I have less bad days now than I did a week ago
The sad, confused state is over 
I am now trying to work out what happened
But now, the anger is starting to set in

I don't want to be angry because someone rejected me
I want to love them despite the pain I feel
Not love him as if he were my lover
But love him that I feel no animosity.

This year has been a year of struggle for me.
I have finally accepted that I am different
And though the world tries to break me, I find that I am more confident in my uniqueness
Last year, I committed my life fully to God
And I am happy I am now following the way Christ has laid down for me

I asked him to break and remould me 
Starting from the inside
And I know HE is working inside of me
And in the right season, I WILL bear fruit

I am thankful God has blessed me with a content spirit
No matter how much or how little I have
I have learnt to not want what I don't have
I have learnt to not even allow such thoughts cross my mind

Through this heartbreak, I know God will do a good thing in my life
One thing is for sure, never getting with anyone without seeking God first
That one is for sure, for sure 

There are many many things God has to change in me 
But I know at the right time he will do it
I will just continue to walk with him as he shows me the way